Problem 2: as a long term dancer she is extremely flexible, particularly the hamstrings, so does anyone have suggestions of some ham stuff I could do? I was gonna do SDLs or RDLs (my gym doesn't allow deads, but you can usually sneak those or their variations in) but she said she didn't feel anything at all and her grip/arm strength doesn't allow her to hold a whole lot of weight (cap of prolly 50 lbs). Our gym doesn't have the ability to do GHRs and poor cuffs for cable hip extension (never, ever stay put). Any suggestions here?
Try single leg rdls (http://www.eiu.edu/~strength/lowerbody_ ... umbbellrdl
She won't need a lot of weight, so grip won't be an issue. She might need to practice balance unloded or lightly loaded. Don't get discouraged if balance is an issue at first.
And another thing. What she feels is not that important. If she can do 10 reps in good form with weight X, but not weight X+5, then you are getting a training effect.