I never seen this thread when it was created.
Hope things keep improving.
I have some sh*t going on now, too, so thought I'd chime on the workout part because I honestly think lifting has kept my sanity in check.
On top of my situation, I also tore a hamstring which took away the 2 things I love to do most - Deadlift and Squat. Generally, if I was ever really stressed, I would just go to the gym and deadlift but I "couldn't even do that".
Btw, this - "couldn't even do that", is the kind of thought that you need to kick out your mind instantly, before they register and get you down. It's negative and, just adds to any other negativity that's already floating around. We all have an "inner voice" and if it's filled with thoughts that put you down, then you're going to feel very low. I honestly believe (infact, know) this is a huge deal, btw. The mind is an extremely powerful thing.
Think of like going for a new PB - if you constantly tell yourself before the lift that you're NOT going to make it, I guarantee you won't make it. If you constantly think negatively of yourself, then you are not going to feel very positive.
Going back to my training, I had to just forget DL's and squats. What COULD I do? I could train upper body, and focus on getting better on one leg, I could do all those things that i've been meaning to do for ages but never got round to. Like learn some olympic lifts or, Turkish get ups. Mess around with some complexes. Learn how to kick properly and spar a little. If feels GOOD to develop new skills.
Also, for the upper body lifts I could do, I used the 5-3-1 progression, which you start with 90% of your 1RM. This means that for the first few months, even on a bad day you will make your reps and probably even exceed them. It could be worth doing this but, starting with 80% of your 1RM. You would beat the minimum reps every single work out. I've done it on hardly any food and 4 hours sleep - even in that case, you can do "what you need to do" and walk out with your head held high and clear refreshed mind set.
I also just accepted that I wouldn't be able to eat enough consistently enough to add any muscle mass so, I dropped it from my priority list. All i focused on was getting stronger on the 2 lifts that I used 5-3-1 for, and getting more comfortable/competent with the new things I was learning.
I also generally thrive on the intensity of a training session. Even if i'm not as good as this time last year, I feel great after throwing around some weights. It feels fantastic, even if a lot of other things in life at the moment don't. I don't even think about anything whilst training (which is probably key!). I'm kind of in a daze the whole time, if anything i'm just thinking about technique etc.
I've "trained for sanity" for years now but this past year has been the most testing. I think because i've always used it as a stress release, I have come to rely on it. I don't think it's bad at all. If my family need me and I feel weak, I go to the gym, drift into myself and lift till I can't lift any more. Then I get a shower, walk to the supermarket, drink milk, eat a flap jack, and feel fantastic. It's as if zapping away my physical strength in the gym gives me mental strength outside of it and then i'm ready to be there for whatever i'm needed for. If I feel myself getting mentally weak and pity beginning to set in, I "save it" for the gym, I make a mental note that I need to train at the next available opportunity - as priority, because I know it will flush away the crap.
Also, don't know if you read much but I would recommend you read more, or start reading. Reading to the mind is what exercise is to the body.
This is what works for ME, anyway.
If I were to summarise this, the underlying theme is - Better yourself. Get better, improve! Even if it means taking 10 steps back to allow a steady weekly/monthly progression. Or just learning something new (like Yoga!), or reading some more (or at all). There is something empowering about constantly getting better. There's something about it which gives you that inner confidence needed to kick the sh*t out of life and not let any Thing or any One get you down.
Not sure if that will help or not but, I felt compelled to reply.