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Am I the only one?

Posted: Wed Nov 23, 2011 11:30 am
by CorlessJohnJ
I can't stant seeing people stronger bigger more cut etc. It motivates the hell out of me.

I want to be the biggest strongest fastest etc and if I see someone who may be bigger more cut etc I look through them...or don't look at them at all. I don't know if its the whole Alpha male thing or what but that alllllllways gets to me.

Am I the only one who constantly compares and wants more always? I hope I am not alone.

Re: Am I the only one?

Posted: Wed Nov 23, 2011 11:48 am
by stuward
Competition is a good thing that I think motivates a lot of people. You're just more open about it.

Re: Am I the only one?

Posted: Wed Nov 23, 2011 12:43 pm
by Oscar_Actuary
sometimes John, I'd be more concerned about what other issues you are avoiding as you obsess over your physique

or maybe I'm just jealous of your passion for something.

one of those two

Re: Am I the only one?

Posted: Wed Nov 23, 2011 2:22 pm
by CorlessJohnJ
Oscar_Actuary wrote:sometimes John, I'd be more concerned about what other issues you are avoiding as you obsess over your physique

or maybe I'm just jealous of your passion for something.

one of those two
What am i avoiding... and you make me think lol folding my laundry or hanging it up immediately? haha thats about it lol

Re: Am I the only one?

Posted: Wed Nov 23, 2011 3:16 pm
by Rik-Blades
Well obviously not, what about all the bodybuilders in the world.

I'm slightly confused by your question though, If you cant stand to look at them, how do you use that for motivation?
Surley you should be paying most attention, seeing where you can improve/be better? Dare I say learn something?

I think you need to be careful that your passion/movtivation (whatever it is) doesnt come across as arrogance. It's a sure fire way to lose friends.

Re: Am I the only one?

Posted: Wed Nov 23, 2011 4:17 pm
by CorlessJohnJ
Rik-Blades wrote:Well obviously not, what about all the bodybuilders in the world.

I'm slightly confused by your question though, If you cant stand to look at them, how do you use that for motivation?
Surley you should be paying most attention, seeing where you can improve/be better? Dare I say learn something?

I think you need to be careful that your passion/movtivation (whatever it is) doesnt come across as arrogance. It's a sure fire way to lose friends.

If they are my friends I wouldn't not look at them if anything I'm one of the most approachable guys at the gym.

I'm just saying I know they have more time under the bar more money or more consistency then me. My goal is to be bigger and better and I will be I "notice" them but don't give them undue attention if they are bigger than me its cause they have been doing it longer or have been blessed to not be brought up poverty stricken like I was.

Re: Am I the only one?

Posted: Wed Nov 23, 2011 10:17 pm
by Jungledoc
I think it's a shame that you can't relate positively to someone who is ahead of you. Sure, use them for motivation. But I fear that you don't have a real healthy basis for your own self-esteem if you have to be bigger and more cut than everyone in the world in order to be happy about yourself. You need to accept that there will always be someone better than you in any criterion you choose to consider. But you are also better than everyone you meet in some way. Way better for you to go introduce yourself, shake their hand, and swap training tips!

Re: Am I the only one?

Posted: Thu Nov 24, 2011 8:02 am
by commodiusvicus
Jungledoc wrote:I think it's a shame that you can't relate positively to someone who is ahead of you. Sure, use them for motivation. But I fear that you don't have a real healthy basis for your own self-esteem if you have to be bigger and more cut than everyone in the world in order to be happy about yourself. You need to accept that there will always be someone better than you in any criterion you choose to consider. But you are also better than everyone you meet in some way. Way better for you to go introduce yourself, shake their hand, and swap training tips!
This is very good advice, and something i need to keep in mind, myself.

To further expound upon this point for the sake of CorlessJohnJ (and for my own): There's no use raging against genetics, nor is there any use thinking "I could've started sooner, I could've worked harder". That stuff is all formed. Feeling bad won't make you stronger, only work will. Better instead to use that energy to motivate you in a positive direction, to do today's workout, to finish THIS set, to move THIS weight.

I find that i'm never satisfied if i compare my own achievements to the achievements of others. None of us is completely immune to such destructive thought processes, but i think we can get better at avoiding them, just as we can get better at working out. Rather than allowing yourself to feel diminished because of what someone else can do, just look at how far you've come since you started. Comparing yourself to yourself is the only way there ever was.

Re: Am I the only one?

Posted: Thu Nov 24, 2011 9:40 am
by robertscott
getting down because there's people bigger/stronger than you is just weird. There's always going to be someone bigger or stronger. Always. Might as well get used to it.

Re: Am I the only one?

Posted: Sat Nov 26, 2011 7:23 am
by CorlessJohnJ
I don't get "down" when someone is bigger or stronger. That's to be expected, I am only 5'8. I think most people on this forum didn't get what I was getting at.

I'm not arrogant not at all. I'm not down. I am not sad. I don't think the world hates me or that I have a horrible body or am weak.

I was asking if there was anyone on this site exrx.net that has similiar feelings. I just wanted to relate to someone I guess and discuss it. Not have people assume I'm arrogant. I have done my research and I see these guys that are bigger than me doing the same exact things I do but they have been doing it longer have had more money to supplement have either done a few cycles of steroids or a combination of all of them.

They motivate me. They piss me off. But they motivate me.

Re: Am I the only one?

Posted: Sat Nov 26, 2011 11:06 am
by Oscar_Actuary
before I did any training I could not care less about what other guys looked like or how many cylces they injected
Now, since I've actually started to train and care about what I look like, well, yeah, I still don't care what others look like.

Re: Am I the only one?

Posted: Sat Nov 26, 2011 12:14 pm
by CorlessJohnJ
Oscar_Actuary wrote:before I did any training I could not care less about what other guys looked like or how many cylces they injected
Now, since I've actually started to train and care about what I look like, well, yeah, I still don't care what others look like.
Haha well. We are different aren't we? I probably have issues. LOL

Re: Am I the only one?

Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2011 3:29 pm
by 13lind Dog
Jungledoc wrote:You need to accept that there will always be someone better than you in any criterion you choose to consider. But you are also better than everyone you meet in some way. Way better for you to go introduce yourself, shake their hand, and swap training tips!
Great advice!

Re: Am I the only one?

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2011 5:23 pm
by CorlessJohnJ
commodiusvicus wrote:
Jungledoc wrote:I think it's a shame that you can't relate positively to someone who is ahead of you. Sure, use them for motivation. But I fear that you don't have a real healthy basis for your own self-esteem if you have to be bigger and more cut than everyone in the world in order to be happy about yourself. You need to accept that there will always be someone better than you in any criterion you choose to consider. But you are also better than everyone you meet in some way. Way better for you to go introduce yourself, shake their hand, and swap training tips!
This is very good advice, and something i need to keep in mind, myself.

To further expound upon this point for the sake of CorlessJohnJ (and for my own): There's no use raging against genetics, nor is there any use thinking "I could've started sooner, I could've worked harder". That stuff is all formed. Feeling bad won't make you stronger, only work will. Better instead to use that energy to motivate you in a positive direction, to do today's workout, to finish THIS set, to move THIS weight.

I find that i'm never satisfied if i compare my own achievements to the achievements of others. None of us is completely immune to such destructive thought processes, but i think we can get better at avoiding them, just as we can get better at working out. Rather than allowing yourself to feel diminished because of what someone else can do, just look at how far you've come since you started. Comparing yourself to yourself is the only way there ever was.

Really excellent advice I have to realise I am only me. I should compare my current self to my past self to see progress.... Hmm I'll introspectively analyse later on some down time... maybe write out some numbers haha. Thanks :D

John

Re: Am I the only one?

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2011 9:44 pm
by Jungledoc
You're a good guy, John C.