i'm losing motivation and needing help

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uvhst3p
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i'm losing motivation and needing help

Post by uvhst3p » Mon Sep 22, 2008 6:05 am

hey guys, so i've been working out for just a couple of months now. i am male, 23 yrs old, 5 feet, 109 lbs. i don't know but i'm not motivated much anymore when working out. sometimes, i just want to skip the session and just eat. i miss the days when i ate chocolate and tortilla chips and potato chips and all kinds of chips. i miss the days when all i do after work is sit down and watch television instead of working out outside where the tv has no access. i know that results like muscle definition and a six/eight pac take a long time to develop but seeing just a little of that on my body would be great. :sigh: also, i feel like i'm not getting any stronger. i mean sure i've upped the weight since i started but now, i've hit some stalling points and i think that i have stalled too early...way too early. i am now having a hard time overhead pressing 50 lbs, bench pressing 60 lbs, and lat pulldown of 65 lbs

so i am asking you guys for some motivational stuff. thanks in advance


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Post by jeffrerr » Mon Sep 22, 2008 6:36 am

Firstly what is your goal? At 5 feet 109lbs I'm guessing it's not weightloss! If you want to eat chips, eat them! You can get ripped and cut out the chips when they've helped you to bulk up a little!

As for the gym, have you changed yuor routine since you started? Maybe going through the motions is getting boring, it might be time for a change to stimulate some new muscles? Can you post your current workout plan so others can make suggestions on what might be a good swap?

As for motivation, I'm a terrible self motivator in the gym, but I find having a good training partner is the best way to get motivated! Someone around your own ability is good, but someone a little more advacned then yourself who can motivate you to catch them can also work!

Anyway, good luck with it man!

John

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Post by uvhst3p » Mon Sep 22, 2008 6:47 am

jeffrerr wrote:Firstly what is your goal? At 5 feet 109lbs I'm guessing it's not weightloss! If you want to eat chips, eat them! You can get ripped and cut out the chips when they've helped you to bulk up a little!

As for the gym, have you changed yuor routine since you started? Maybe going through the motions is getting boring, it might be time for a change to stimulate some new muscles? Can you post your current workout plan so others can make suggestions on what might be a good swap?

As for motivation, I'm a terrible self motivator in the gym, but I find having a good training partner is the best way to get motivated! Someone around your own ability is good, but someone a little more advacned then yourself who can motivate you to catch them can also work!

Anyway, good luck with it man!

John
well, my main goal is really getting stronger. the other one is getting abs.

nope, i haven't changed my routine since i started. i think you're right. maybe it's getting boring.

my current routine is just two workouts simultaneously:
workout A:
3x5to7 bench press
3x5to7 bent over row
3x5to7 bb squat
3x5to7 rdl
3x15 sit-ups

workout B:
3x5to7 standing overhead press
3x5to7 wide grip front lat pulldown
3x5to7 rdl
3x5to7 bb squat
3x15 sit-ups

- it's 5 to 7 reps. once i complete 3x7 for a weight, i move up 5 lbs then do 3x5

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Post by KPj » Mon Sep 22, 2008 6:47 am

Read this. Sounds to me like you've approached that mental battle that seperates the men from the boys. Sometimes, you just need to be aware of what's happening, and grind it out.

http://www.t-nation.com/free_online_for ... _the_grind

If your lifts have stopped going up then maybe you need a change, need to eat more, need more sleep?

But honestly, if you're a newbie, it will go like this,

Mental battle to start -> finally start-> love it, wow, DOMS is amazing -> you love bench pressing -> OMG I have biceps -> Jee... this is hard -> I'm getting fed up -> .....I want to give up...

This process is normal. Once you get here, your training is just beginining. As the link says, just grind it out - this feels like the worse phase of training, but if you keep at it, it will turn out to be the best. All that's happened is the novelty of a 'new you' has worn off. Now, instead of seeing your ideal physique, you only see the hard work that it takes. This is where you fight to make the hard work become the norm.

The above process will either end in you giving up, getting mad with yourself, and going on a junk food binge. Or you'll get to the -> OMG-i-love-lifting-and-can't-think-about-anything-else phase.

KPj

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Re: i'm losing motivation and needing help

Post by Jungledoc » Mon Sep 22, 2008 7:06 am

uvhst3p wrote: so i am asking you guys for some motivational stuff. thanks in advance
Hey, Anshan! Sorry to hear you're feeling down.

I know that you have some challenges that we don't all have.

(Guys who are new to the forum, Anshan works out at home, as there aren't any affordable gyms where he lives.)

How about finding a work-out partner? You mentioned once that your uncle was using your weights--does he work out? How about if you do it together to encourage each other? Or find someone else around.

If it were easy, it probably wouldn't be worth doing. Stick with it!

And don't listen to anyone who tells you to eat more chips! I do agree that you need to eat more, but we've been through that before! Eat more good stuff. Since you have the job, I was hoping you could afford more meat and eggs. I think if you are better nourished, you'll feel better over all. And be able to lift better, too.


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Post by stuward » Mon Sep 22, 2008 7:18 am

I agree, it's the lack of good food that's depleting your energy. Chips and candy will have a negative effect overall. You need to get the maximum nutrition for your grocery dollar. Chips arn't the way to do that. You need to look for seasonal bargins at your local veg market. If you need more calories, beans and whole grains are cheaper than the same calories from veg and fruit and almost as nutritious.

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Post by jeffrerr » Mon Sep 22, 2008 7:20 am

Well it looks like you've got a good strength building workout giong, KPj is right in that this is a phase where most people falter or succeed! I'm a falterer of late, when I was a teenager it was different, my life goals were different too so it made it easier back then.

Anyway, I'd suggest you change up some exercises, go form BB's to DB's and vice versa on a few things, maybe try some different sets to rep ratios on lighter and heavier weights and throw in some other ab work instead of just plain jane sit ups, maybe on an incline bench or something.

Also don't be fooled by the hype on abs, they will come with other compound exercises almost as much as with specific 'ab' execises, it's more about fat% with abs (trust me I've not seen mine for years!) and you also need to make sure you strengthen your lower back so that you don't get an imbalance in your midsection.

Also try doing things like Super Sets, where you can work two opposing muscle groups straight after ech other than rest, I like to do Chest and Back in this fashion. I do a set of bench press followed by a set of front lat pull downs then a 1 minute rest and then another set. After 3 sets I rest for 4 minutes before going onto a set of seated rows followed by incline bench press with a 1 minute rest before the next set. I do a lot of other super sets with bi seps and tri ceps, it's jsut a different approach but i find it brings my work out times down by about 20% as you're resting the first muscle during the second exercise, there for getting a minutes rest plus however long the other muscle group takes to do a set on! These are a personal favourite, but not everyone likes them!

Anyway, as KPj suggested, it's up to you to break through! Go for it and keep us informed on how you go!

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Post by Stephen Johnson » Mon Sep 22, 2008 8:13 am

For people who aren't highly self-motivated in their workouts, a training partner is an obvious answer. Even a highly motivated bodybuilder like Arnold admits that most of his progress came as a result of the friendly competition that he had training with other bodybuilders. The members of this board can't actually be with you when you work out.
Last edited by Stephen Johnson on Tue Sep 23, 2008 8:16 am, edited 2 times in total.

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Re: i'm losing motivation and needing help

Post by KPj » Mon Sep 22, 2008 8:15 am

Jungledoc wrote: (Guys who are new to the forum, Anshan works out at home, as there aren't any affordable gyms where he lives.)
If working out at home and you lack options, then you can still make some subtle changes which will could make all the difference.

I guess he just needs to figure out whether he's not eating enough, has reached that first mental barrier (the grind), or needs a change in routine.

Workout wise, thought forsome subtle changes,

1. change sets and rep ranges i.e. 5 x 5, 8 x 3, 6 x 4 etc

2. Change grip i.e. standard BB to Close Grip Bench, Back squat to Front squat, closer grip lat pull downs, overhand / underhand for B/over row, changing sit ups for reverse crunches (or push ups or something)

3. Change stance - Close stance or wide stance for squat, single leg RLD (lot's of single leg options), floor press instead of bench press (or board press).

4. standing shoulder press to 'push press'.

There's lots of options really. Some subtle changes here and there can really freshen things up. Even just changin rep range.

KPj

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Re: i'm losing motivation and needing help

Post by jeffrerr » Mon Sep 22, 2008 8:28 am

Jungledoc wrote:
uvhst3p wrote: so i am asking you guys for some motivational stuff. thanks in advance
And don't listen to anyone who tells you to eat more chips! I do agree that you need to eat more, but we've been through that before! Eat more good stuff. Since you have the job, I was hoping you could afford more meat and eggs. I think if you are better nourished, you'll feel better over all. And be able to lift better, too.
I wasn't saying eat more chips! I was just saying that at his height and weight keeping weight off was the least of his worries! However hearing more about his background, I would definitely suggest laying off the chips and candy and spending his hard earned on meat, fruit and vegetables. If they don't taste as good buy herbs and spices that add flavour to make them more palatable! I would never suggest eating MORE chips to anyone!

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Post by pdellorto » Mon Sep 22, 2008 12:45 pm

I'm sorry to hear your motivation is starting to wane. Sadly this isn't uncommon.

What I'd do if I were you is to remind yourself of why you do all of this. If writing it down helps for you, do that. Get a list of pros and cons going. Help yourself remember what you want to accomplish and why this is important to you. If it's not, well, then the chips and TV are right there...but I'm betting it is important or you'd have skipped posting this here.

Everyone has a different reason to do all of this. You need to find your and latch onto it. The grind of lots of working out with slow gains is hard, so find out what will get you through it. Ultimately you have to do that for yourself.

Finding a workout partner can help a lot. I'm almost totally self-motivated and even so, I'm enjoying working out where other hardcore athletes lift. Every little bit helps!

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Post by Onlyethic » Mon Sep 22, 2008 3:21 pm

I think pretty much everything said so far is very valuable regarding motivation. Eat right, find a good partner, accept that drive comes and goes, and be mindful of why you're in this.

In terms of the resistance of your lifts fluctuating, it is something to look at, but don't get hung up on it. As mentioned, nutrition might have something to do with this, but also over-lifting or a number of other possibilities might be causing a temporary plateau.

All that said, I'd say go out and do something that puts your strength to the test in a very real way. Head to the rock climbing wall, find a game of pickup basketball, even help a friend out move houses/apartments (i.e. lift awkward things).

My guess is that you will notice definite gains relative to where you used to be. Even if your shoulder press hasn't budged in a while, you've probably developed important muscles where there was serious weakness before. You'll notice this in doing something moderately to intensely physical that you've done many times before (sports, moving stuff, etc) as you'll probably do it better and with less effort. And noticing this will provide a definite boost to your motivation (and your ego).

Anyways, at the end of the day, know that sometimes feeling a bit fed up is natural and that it will pass. Throw your hands into the air, go see a movie, forget about your training for an evening (or even a day), and then get back into it ready to improve. It will happen. Maybe slowly, but definitely steadily.

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Post by nygmen » Mon Sep 22, 2008 7:34 pm

I may be way off base here, but are you ever angry?

I have my best workouts when I'm so beyond upset I have no choice but to zone into what I'm doing, next thing you know, your head is spinning and you need to sit down. As you sit you notice the bar (or whatever you're using for weight) has more than it did on it last week, and you know you can do it again if you had to. Even if it's not more weight, isn't the head spin one of the best parts?

I love my job & my employer, but sometimes clients, co-workers & bosses drive me to want to strangle someone. I say nothing, but I do something, later in the gym/at home that most of those fat annoying bastards wish they could do. I'm sorry but I get more exercise in one set of Deadlifts than the new ball busting bastard gets in his 18 holes.

I failed at this stage once in my life and it took 3 years to come back from the dark side. So even if you fail one day, or one meal, or even one month. It's not over. Being an underdog is good; it's the best place in life to be, because success tastes so much sweeter when you know what rock bottom smells like. Don't be afraid of being the underdog, or being damn proud of yourself for it.

It's never over until your Doc says no, or your body doesn't move.

(If it's emotional, I've seen a professional & been medicated before too. Don't be too proud, never be too proud to talk to someone, anyone. If you can't afford a psychologist, there are a lot of people that will listen. I often found the "lay man" a more comforting listener anyway. Just talk to someone. Even if your not religious, I'm pretty sure when a priest sits in one of those little two room boxes, he has to listen to you.)

Sorry for ranting.

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Post by uvhst3p » Tue Sep 23, 2008 3:20 am

hello all. thanks for the replies. i will post a much meaningful thanks later when i get home. it's hard to post here at the office when you are constantly looking over my shoulder to see if the boss is coming

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Post by uvhst3p » Sun Sep 28, 2008 6:23 am

workout partner? i only live with my girlfriend, my "happy" cousin, and both my grandparents from my father's side. my uncle has a restaurant at lovely boracay and does not come here often now.

from the description, i think i am doing supersets. it's bench press to bent over row, standing press to lat pulldown, and bb squat to rdl.

i thought about things and i won't change my routine yet until i reach a respectable level for my lifts

thanks for the info about the grind. i can relate that to "the wall" for running. i know it exists but sometimes i just need to read it or something so that i'll understand it again.

i get angry but it only lasts a couple of minutes. i don't like getting angry :)

anyways, thanks for all the inputs guys. i'm sorry it took so long to reply. i've been so busy at work. i promised a more meaningful thanks right? well, i can't really think if anything but all i can say is that i am really thankful for all your words of advice


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